Negativity breeds Negativity

Isn't it true? When something bad or negative happens in our lives, we feel bummed and crappy about it? Then we start playing it through our minds as what we could have done differently and think "If only.....". I know I'm kind of feeling like this except, I'm trying to look towards family for support and reassurance. I'm trying to look for the positive in this negative.

My issue is all after yesterdays weigh-in at my weekly Weight Watcher meeting. I arrive feeling good, feeling like I did good for the week. I walked, did the Wii Fit and thought I did good eating-wise. WRONG! I gained a fricken pound! WTF??!! The lady asked what I did differently. I started thinking to myself. "Well, I didn't have my computer for 3 days." My tracking could have been off I thought. Then I went to sit down and tell my mom and our friend. They both ask the "not so comfortable" question, "Did you start?" LOL Like anyone cares to know. Then comes the wave of negativity. I start to look at my membership book with all my weigh-ins. What I found was, this whole month has been a roller coaster ride. Lose, gain, lost what I gained, gained what I lost. Did I reach a plateau??? DAMN! I start to stress and ask my mom and as my wonderful mom says "Honey, you're doing great! You'll start losing it." I sure love her so much! Even though my mom is giving me all this positive re-enforcement, I still can't help but to think "How much longer before I will get over this hump? What do I need to do differently??"

So, on the drive home I was feeling bummed. I was going to set my weight goal with Weight Watchers, 3 lbs less than I originally decided but now that I may have hit a plateau, I just may leave it at the original goal. I know it's only 3 lbs but look at the rate of this month. I can't seem to get past 2 lbs.

My husband doesn't help the matter one I-oda. "I'm disappointed", he says. There's that fricken joking crap that I hate!!! I told him that I need to hear "Babe, you'll get past this and lose it. I know you will." He has been so good and giving me all the love and support but he just decided to joke with me at the wrong time.

I decided to get on my web tools for WW and was trying to see if I could see anything else that maybe I missed and could learn from. I had also noticed that I didn't eat all my points for 3 days which could also be the culprit. The one thing that I do have to look forward to is, the one week that I did my absolute best was the week we went to Disneyland back in May, go figure. Well, we are once again going in 2 weeks so I am so excited! Not only for the fact that it's Disneyland, but for the fact that I should have a successful trip with a positive outcome!!

So through all this, I'm just trying to find positives from this negative which is helping me. Remember, negativity breeds negativity. I am just hoping that this isn't a plateau. I know I'll reach it at some point but I'm trying to dodge it for as long as possible. I won't give up and I plan to stay in the game!!

I've got a bone to pick!

You know what's aggravating? What's aggravating is when my husband says "I guess I need to do laundry" or "I'm gonna clean out the fridge since it's garbage night". Sure, you may think either one of two things; 1) That's great that he'll help her with the laundry and/or clean the fridge out" or 2) "What? He doesn't think she's doing HER job?" If you're thinking #2, then you know why I am aggravated right now!

OK, my husband likes to seriously joke around but also just joke in general. I HATE it when he does it. I never grew up in a "That 70's Show" type of household. When my dad joked, I could never tell and thought he was serious which resulted in me getting into trouble OR when he wasn't joking and I took him jokingly, I once again got into trouble. So you can see why I don't like joking around about, well....more or less, stupid shit!

So back to my main point of this blog. So, when Paul makes this sort of comment (just joking as he claims), he makes me feel "less than". Like I'm not doing my job. I'm sorry though, I work a regular job (part-time with a 50 min drive in traffic each, to and from work), I clean this house constantly and pick up after everyone, I cook, I take care of our child and I volunteer at her school. I have my hands full. I may slack off on laundry (cause I can't stand doing it) but he should just say "Hey babe, can you wash my clothes" instead of "I guess I need to do laundry", and when it comes to the kitchen stuff, that's my domain. STAY OUT! My kitchen is clean and I don't like it dirty. Don't make a sandwich and leave mayo or bread crumbs on the counter and then turn around and say "I need to clean the fridge out cause it's garbage night". I'm I right ladies or am I right???!!! I even snapped at him and told him to worry about his own stuff before picking on my stuff. RAR!!!

I'm back online!!

So today is Sunday, eight days since we dropped off our computer at Best Buy's Geek Squad. Yesterday we were so impatient that we decided to call them to check the status of our computer. They were so busy that I had to leave a message. That was in the morning. We left for the State Fair for the day but when we got home after midnight, to our dismay, no messages. The Geeks didn't call. *sniff sniff*

So instead, this morning we just went straight down there. No messing around here. We're having withdrawls. I want my computer!! Once there, we get up to the counter and talk to the tech guy. He goes to the back and sure enough, it's ready!! YAH!!!

So now I'm sitting here trying (keyword: trying) to write this blog and I have my daughter in the kitchen calling for me cause she wants to be done with her dinner. Leave me alone!!! I know that sounds terrible but damn.....I have spent the last 7 days without the computer (except for at work) and I just want a few minutes of quiet time to write my blog. Is that too much to ask for??!! *sigh*

So yah for my computer and yah to be back online with all my friends!!

The things I love

There is so much negativity going on in this world right now from gas prices to people losing their homes to the daily political updates. That's why I felt I needed to take a moment to just reflect on the things I love most. So here is a list in no particular order....

• My daughter
• When she laughs
• When she runs her toes through my hair (ok, it seems wierd, lol but 10 years from now when she wishes I wasn't around is when I'm gonna miss this!!)
• Sabrina's many milestones!
• My husband
• Holding my husband's hand
• Holding my daughter's hand
• Family get togethers
• Hugs and kisses
• My doggie
• When my husband makes me laugh
• Talking with my husband, pure conversation
• Being alone with him
• My whole family (parents, brother, etc)
• Mexican food and pizza
• Anything spicy!!!!! Life would be boring without a little spiciness!!
• Getting hugs from my baby girl
• My friends
• My wedding day
• My wedding ring
• My honeymoon in the Bahamas and Key West
• The summer time
• The sunshine
• Palm trees
• The ocean
• Riding bikes as a family
• Carmel
• Receiving flowers
• The sun peeking through trees
• Sunsets
• Christmas when I was a kid
• The feeling I get when it's almost Fall.
• Fog and the way it looks early in the morning
• Animals
• L.A. days. When I was a kid in the summertime, I would always get that feeling of a day in L.A. I don't know how to explain it but I would always tell my mom it felt like an L.A. day. Not sure how I came up with that since I only went there once as a kid. Maybe from movies.
• The movie A Christmas Story
• The movie Friday
• Laughing so hard I have to pee
• Laughter
• Waking up early, so early it's still dark out, just to go somewhere
• Going to lunch with my daughter, just her and I
• Running my toes through the sand
• Making snow angels
• Hiking
• Disneyland, the excitement never ends!
• Having my own house
• Watching movies
• Cozing up with a blanket in the winter
• Hot tea
• Hot chocolate with marshmellows
• Going to the movies
• Eating frozen yogurt, no toppings please!
• Driving fast
• Falling asleep on the couch
• Playing the Wii
• Looking at the stars
• Nature.....beautiful!
• Feeling loved
• Daydreaming
• Anticipation for that "whatever"
• Loud music
• Music: Smooth Jazz, Rock, Alternative
• Cartoons, Spongebob in particular!
• Everything Disney!!
• The color purple, my fav!
• Plants, they add life to a room.
• Mint Ice Tea from Uno Chicago Grill
• Butterflies and ladybugs
• Thanksgiving
• Halloween
• God, Jesus
• Tropical Islands
• Birds chirping in the morning
• Flowers
• Eating at restaurants
• Vegas Baby!
• Hawaii
• Vacations
• Love
• Happiness
• Food
• Being healthy
• Feeling healthy
• Color
• Photography
• Snoopy and the Peanuts gang
• Sunday drives
• Shopping
• TV
• Sleeping
• A good hair day
• Feeling clean
• Camping
• Intimate moments with my husband
• Haunted houses and getting scared
• My shows, Ghost Whisperer, Desperate Housewives, Kitchen Nightmares and Tori and Dean
• Reading Tori Spellings book, Stori Telling
• Being feisty
• Mini golf
• Not being competative
• Wine tasting
• Watching Sabrina on Christmas morning, priceless!
• Being called "Mommy", just warms my heart!
• Being a mom
• Every good moment in life
• Jeans
• Feeling good in my clothes
• Walking
• The wind blowing through my hair
• Earrings
• My days off
• Having the convenience of a cell phone
• My computer, I miss you!
• Freedom
• Hollywood gossip
• Roller coasters
• Our country, just not the people running it!
• The sound of trains at home at night when our windows are open
• Looking at model homes
• Interior design
• Classic movies
• Getting comments
• Accomplishing goals, goals I didn't think I could accomplish.
• Lemonade stands
• Being alive
• Living life!

What about you?

Funny things that kids say

I just had to share this little funny! Now, my husband and I have been together this year for 15 years. When it comes to sex, it's not all romantic all the time. Being parents (as most of you can relate to), it's not easy to find time and we just need to fit in "our time" when possible. As Sabrina is getting older, it has gotten a lot easier cause now she sleeps through the night and goes to bed at a decent time because of school. No interruptions!

Well, Paul and I will ask each other out of the blue, in front of Sabrina, if we are going to do something tonight *wink wink*! (LOL! Well, we have to word things in such a way that isn't crude or inappropriate). Since Sabrina is there hearing this, she gets excited and shares in the conversation and says "I would like to do something tonight!" Paul and I laugh almost quietly cause she has no idea what we are talking about. She'll even start throwing out ideas of what we can do. It's just so cute and innocent!

I feel so violated

I hate having viruses and I'm not talking about the ones that infect our body making us feel ill, uncomfortable or lethargic. I'm talking about the ones that make our computers ill. Trojan's!!

We have Norton Antivirus and our subscription expired in January of this year. When the big red "X" appeared cause it expired, I told my husband that we needed to update it with the new years version. He kept telling "not now, later". Sure, we were still protected from any viruses from that year or prior but anything new we weren't. I kept thinking to myself "boy, we sure are lucky but it's only a matter of time" as time went on . Well, Friday our luck ran out.

I got on the computer Friday, just after dinner and started browsing layouts for my blogger. I noticed that the computer started to slow down and then noticed at the bottom right by the time, there was an icon that I hadn't seen before. I clicked it and it popped up saying it was Antivirus XP 2008. I thought it was from my computer cause I have XP and thought it was telling me to purchase their antivirus cause my computer was infected. It also made it look like it was scanning my computer so I stopped the scan. That stuff just freaks me out. I had no doubt that my computer could have been infected but I wasn't purchasing something from a pop up. I feel more comfortable going down to Best Buy and purchasing it from there.

At that point I kept trying to get rid of it but it wouldn't go away and had no option to "close" or "exit". I decided to called my husband in to take a look. He started to accuse, it seemed ask me what I was doing before it came up. I explained and then informed him that it could have come from any of the sites either of us have visited and that we don't know how long it has actually been on our computer before it decided to act.

We started to worry that all 10,000 + pictures that we have accumulated on our computer would be lost from this. At that point we decided that it was finally time to purchase the new Norton Antivirus (you think??!!) and while we were there we picked up an external hard drive to save all our pictures cause I would just be devastated if I lost them. They date back to 2004 which is most of Sabrina's life.

We went to Best Buy, got what we needed and saved all the pictures. Now our computer is at Best Buy in the hands of the Geek Squad.......my heroes!! I just feel so violated that this had to happen. We have never had this problem in the 9 years we have owned a computer. The lame thing is, we feel so dependant on the thing. 15 years ago computers weren't in most households and now look how we have become, so dependant on them. It's as if our lives revolve around computers. I must say, for us it's pure convenience, really. If anything we want to do, we look on the computer for where to go, what time things start or even directions. We even book all our vacations that way. We can price check and it's just easier and faster than contacting a travel agency.

So, here I am at work (once again!) blogging cause of course, I can't do it at home. At least I can come here and update or check all the things I need to. It's just a good thing the boss isn't here all this week!!

Once again....I blame the heat!

As we all have noticed, this whole week has been quite the hot one here in the Bay Area. As I had discussed my dismay for the heat in my last blog, I now have another reason for hating the excessive heat.

Because it's been so hot lately, I haven't been going for my walks as I should have. Sure, I went bike riding over the weekend but that was it. I've been drinking a lot of water too trying to keep hydrated. However, I have noticed that I have felt bloated for the past few days and I knew that Thursdays weigh-in was coming up and was feeling doubtful about my weekly progress report.

So, yesterday being Thursday I head down to Weight Watchers for my weekly meeting and the oh so anticipated weigh-in. I go up to Maryann, the lady by the scale and she asked "So, how are you doing today?" "We'll see" I replied. I step on the scale and stood still for a few seconds. She starts to jot down my progress so I ask, "Did I lose?" "No, you gained 1.8 lbs." Dang it!! I knew it. Fricken heat!! She asked me if I was surprised and honestly, no I wasn't but was hopeful. I told her that the heat had been getting to me and so I hadn't been as active as prior weeks. She did let me know that because of the heat, a lot of people have been retaining water and that I should be able to notice next week. That's it! Retaining water. No wonder I have been feeling so bloated and crappy lately. I always forget about the whole retaining water thing but at least it's an excuse I'll accept :O)

Now, on Wednesday my husband Paul had gone to Antioch's new grand opening of Costco to see if there was any good specials and noticed they had the Wii Fit there. He grabbed it for us! Woo Hoo! So then once I got home from my weigh-in, Paul and Sabrina were playing it. Now I have something to use in the cool a/c during these hot summer days. I'll just continue to take my walks first thing in the morning on my days off. At least I have yesterdays walk at the park to count for this week!

So this weeks goal: Walk 3 more days and play the Wii Fit!!