Saturday, June 6, 2009

Life's Interruptions

Isn't it true? There are so many things that go on in our every day lives that just aren't what we want to face. It can be from minor to major.

For instance, I was at work yesterday, meeting with my boss and every time I tried saying something he would interrupt me. I got frustrated with him too. I told him that I just wish I could talk without being interrupted. It was said in a joking matter so he laughed. No harm done.

Or when I'm talking with my friend on the phone and we have or children on either end trying to talk to us or doing things they shouldn't so we have to stop in mid sentence to tell them "no" or whatever the situation may be.

But then there are the more major things in life. Like, my mom right now has two blood clots in her leg. So she's been out of work for a few days and will continue for another few more days. This has had me stressing because I always tend to think the worse. I just hear of stories where they pop and go to the person's heart, brain or even liver. My mom is only 55 yrs old. I am very close with my mom and I really need her in my life. She's the glue to our family. I love her dearly and I couldn't imagine losing her. She's there when I need to talk about personal things or just because. I feel I need her when my baby girl gets older in case she needs to talk to someone and she doesn't want to talk to me or her daddy. My mom has always been easy to talk to and gives wonderful advise. She doesn't take sides in any situation. She looks at the big picture. I've been praying daily. I just need to have trust and faith in God.

And then there is my 94 year old grandma. She is hanging onto life right now. It's basically the waiting game now. I'm not sure what's worse really, waiting for your loved one to pass and seeing them the way they are, hurting and not able to communicate or they pass unexpectedly without saying goodbye. I guess they're both terrible ways really. I'm not good with death either. I know my grandma has lived a nice long life. I also know she's in pain right now. I just don't want my loved ones to pass on. It really hasn't hit me yet. I guess because I expect it. It's just so sad seeing her so fragile and not eating. She has lost so much weight. She has to be around 90 lbs or less. I was over there visiting yesterday, looking at the pictures of happier times. It's just heartbreaking to see her in the pictures and then seeing her laying in her bed so frail, sleeping or unresponsive.

Also, we had been worried about my grandma and her being right with God. She had said in the past that she expected Jesus into her heart years ago though. Then, in the past few days we've had our Pastor out to see her as we said a prayer together with her. Then yesterday when my parents were over there visiting, my grandma froze and stared straight up as if she saw something. First they thought my grandma had passed away but fortunately she hadn't. Then my mom started thinking that my grandma had seen an angel. My mom and dad later went to the doctors cause my mom had an appointment for her legs and the blood clots. The doctor asked my dad how his mom was and he told her what happened. The doctor said "Oh yeah, she saw a vision." Our family now feels good and feel she'll be going to Heaven. Something we all worried about.

We were told she will probably pass in the next few days. We think she is waiting to see my aunt, her daughter. They never really had a good relationship. I think she's waiting so they can make amends before she goes. My aunt is coming up from So. California today to do just that. I just want them both to have peace in their hearts. Closure.

Then today, with all this happening, we are having my daughter's birthday party. A mixture of good times and bad, huh?!

So, sorry I haven't been on here lately. I guess you can say I've been dealing with some of life's interruptions. I've been trying to pop on to every one's blog to see how you all are doing. I do think about you all. You are on my minds. I promise I'll be back soon. Also, with Vegas next weekend, I'll have pictures to share. I just am having a hard time with that also. It being so close to knowing my grandma is passing and then the funeral. Perhaps we had to book our flight at 6:30pm for a reason, even though we didn't want it that late. Maybe it was meant to be.

4 comments:

Denise said...

I am just in tears reading about all this! Your words about your grandma reminded me of what we went through. My grandma was coherent til the last few hours, but not coherent enough to talk to. It's a VERY hard thing. But in a weird way, when she passed, it brought me peace. Peace knowing she was no longer not feeling good. Peace knowing that she could be herself on the other side. Peace knowing her earthly body was no longer holding her back. Doesn't mean it made it easier, but when she passed, it was somewhat peaceful.

I will pray for your mom. Have they talked about what they will do? Maybe blood thinners or surgery? Scary indeed! Prayers prayers prayers prayers prayers all around!

I miss you! I owe you an email - but like you...I have had some interruptions of my own lately! :)

Young Momma said...

Oh Kimmy!!! I'm so sorry and I pray your mom will be okay and that your grandma will get time with your aunt before he has a peaceful passing. I also hope your family will have the strength they need to get through it. (((hugs))) Enjoy your daughters birthday party! :)

3 Bay B Chicks said...

Oh, my friend. I do not think blogging is meant to be something that we must do each and everyday. It is there when we need it, to share great news, sad news, and everything in between. That is what you are doing with this post and with your blog.

I am saddened to read the news of your mom and grandmother. Both will be in my prayers.

-Francesca

{Diamond} said...

Miss you and hope to see you back soon :-)